You don’t have to take the bar exam to see
What you’ve done is ignoramus one oh three
What’ve I got to hang my hat on
You don’t have a pot to pee in
All this just to be your friend
I was there until the end.
Extortion and arson, petty larceny
I know you called - I know you called - I know you called
I know you called - I know you called - I know you hung up my line
Star sixty-nine
I know all about the warehouse fire
I know squirrelies didn’t chew the wires
3 people have my number
The other 2 were with me.
I don’t like to tell-tell but I’m not your patsy.
This time you have gone too far with me.
I know you called - I know you called - I know you called
I know you called - I know you called - I know you hung up my line
Star sixty-nine
Why’d you put your quarter down on me?
This reads like some dork inside edition hard copy.
I can’t be your character witness
I can’t be your alibi
Doorbell rings it’s the FBI
We learned spy versus spy
You my friend, are guilty as can be.
I know you called - I know you called - I know you called
I know you called - I know you called - I know you hung up my line
Star sixty-nine
(Lyrics are copyright R.E.M. unless otherwise stated as a cover version, in which case copyright is owned by that artist.)